First

For the first time in my life today (I mean yesterday), I am really faced with financial difficulty. Haiz, I went to top up my diesel tank, as usual I topped up $20, after discount its $19. So I went ahead to swipe my card, but alas the most hated things has to happen, my card cannot be used. The counter staff told me that my card is sort of locked and that I may want to check with the bank, but I guess it should be because I do not have money in the account already. This is the first time such a thing has happened. Damn sad man. Luckily I took my mama's atm card with me today (before my mama left, she had purposely left her atm card behind together with her card no. so that I could take money if I need it), else I would not have enough to pay the cashier. Haiz, it does make me look back and think to myself whether the decision to go on this trip is really worth it. I have never been on a trip this disorganised, and with this much problems. Initially after looking at the way they book the hotels and stuff, I already expected some problems to occur, but the problems just seem to be piling and for a moment I did regret accepting the offer to go on the trip. Why am I putting myself in such a situation where I am in such a bad shape. If I had gone to another place, this would be so much easier, and my life would not be this terrible. Right now I am looking forward to the trip, and at the same time hating the trip. It has reached a 50-50 situation, especially the money issue. I am trying my best to accommodate the money problems. As in, if I have to fork out a little bit more, then I try to say its ok with me. But I don't know if the rest realise that I am already pushing my accounts to their limits already. I cannot push myself any further. This is pretty bad, well since its already a fact that I'll be going there then I guess I will have to make the best of it. But I really can't afford anymore hiccups. Going deeper into my piggy bank is a big no no, I'll just work with what I have and try my best to enjoy the month. My mama is now in HK, I hope she is enjoying herself. I miss my mama, I really do. How I wish I can see her right now. Its times like this that I really really miss her, just feel that there are so many things that I can talk to her about. And when she's around, I just keep quiet and sometimes make her mad. I'm trying my best to be a good child, but I'm not up to the mark yet. At 25, she still has to worry about me. Mama, I'm sorry, I will work towards being a better child. But in the mean time, you still gotta help me with my trip. =)