Its the end

I'm not really feeling my best this weekend. Having a very bad headache and feeling really groggy the whole day. In office now staring at the computer screen but my head is fading away. Its like Madonna is dancing in my head to the tune of her latest single - celebration. And she doesn't seem to be stopping any time soon. Just reached office, on a Monday... definately need some time to start my engine, so I thought I'll update my very neglected blog, haha. Yes, I know I have not been updating as often as before, forgive me blog.

Times passes by so quicky, in just what seems like a while, I've already graduated from University for more than a year already. I'm already into my second job, and I've been (trying to) climb the corporate ladder for close to a year already. Everything seems to be happening so fast. Initially, you don't feel the speed of time going by, but when you stop to think about it, you will really find that we are getting old really really fast.

Being in my job for slightly more than 6 months. In fact, my contact with this company should be up by this week. I still have no indication of the management's decision to whether they will continue with another contract, or will they give me a permanent job or will they just thank me for my past efforts. Yes I know this is my Uncle's company, and that there should not be any issue with a permanent position. Seriously, a part of me does not want to leave. Mainly because I feel that I have yet to achieve what I can here, and I am very confident that I can contribute much more if given more time. I want to leave on a high, especially so when relationships are involved in this very complicated office. There is also so much for me to learn, there are so many things that I still do not know. And the bes part about this company is that they are all so willing to share their experience with me. But there is also a part of me that seriously hope that he will tell me that maybe its better for me to look for green pastures elsewhere because I might suit other jobs better. A big part of me really wants to leave too. I've played my relationship cards very close to my heart, and sometimes its difficult and very sressful. There are some things that I find difficult to speak up about, For instance, my pay, my contract (as said earlier I have 1 week left on my contract, so far no one has approached me to talk about a new contract, and I really don't know how to open up about this), additional benefits. The extra stress and restrictions is seriously killing me. I can only wait and see what happens now.

Ok, as I'm looking at this screen, I also seeing some stars as well. My mind is in a frenzy, I cannot really think straight, haiz.... still have lessons tonight, and my Jap test is coming up this wed! I'm so dead... Hopefully I'll be able to last through today in my current condition.